KD blogs on OCD, Trauma, and Neurodivergence

Complex PTSD: When Trauma Is How Your Body Learned to Survive

Written by KD HOLMES, LPC, EMDR CERTIFIED, BTTI TRAINED | Jan 7, 2026 10:40:08 PM

Many new people come into my office asking the same question: Why am I not getting better? 

For many people, the missing piece is complex PTSD.

My practice has a way of becoming a landing place for people who feel stuck—people who’ve already tried therapy. I don’t know if it’s decades of experience, a deep respect for human complexity, or simply the fact that there are a lot of people walking around carrying unresolved layers beneath the surface. It’s probably all of that.

These are clients who have done trauma work like EMDR. They understand their history. They’ve learned coping skills. They can explain why they react the way they do. And still-something doesn’t shift. Symptoms soften but don’t fully resolve. Relationships remain painful or exhausting. Emotions feel either overwhelming or strangely out of reach.

I often describe this as trauma residue. A kind of emotional and physiological imprint that lingers even after insight arrives. It lives in the body. It’s sticky. Emotions catch on it. No matter how much someone understands their story, shame, emptiness, or self-blame keeps resurfacing, as if the nervous system didn’t get the memo that it’s safe now.

Complex PTSD—often called C-PTSD—is not “worse PTSD.” It’s not a failure to heal. It’s a different pattern entirely. And when it’s finally named and understood, the relief can be immediate—not because everything is fixed, but because things finally make sense.

 

 

What Is Complex PTSD?

 

Complex PTSD develops in response to chronic, repeated exposure to trauma over time, especially when that trauma occurs within relationships or during formative years-when there is no reliable path to safety, relief, or repair. Instead of the nervous system stretching and returning to baseline, it learns to stay pulled back. The internal rubber band never fully rebounds forward; it remains under tension, shaping how the body, emotions, and sense of self move through the world long after the original threat has passed.

This can include:

  • Ongoing emotional neglect (Narcissistic abuse, Avoidant parent, Addiction of a parent or partner or severe mental illness)
  • Chronic criticism or invalidation (emotinal abuse, narcissitic abuse)
  • Growing up in unpredictable or unsafe environments (Parental Addiction, Poverty related homelessness, Hoarding)
  • Repeated relational trauma (narcissistic abuse, emotional Physical or sexual abuse)
  • Prolonged exposure to threat, instability, or powerlessness (Emotional Abuse, Parental substance abuse, narcissistic abuse)

While PTSD is often linked to a specific event, complex PTSD is linked to events that are repeated over periods of time.

It’s not just about what happened, it’s about what your nervous system had to do over and over again to survive.

 

How Complex PTSD Is Different from "Single-Event" Trauma

 

Traditional PTSD is often organized around a past event that feels intrusive in the present. Symptoms may include flashbacks, nightmares, avoidance, and hypervigilance tied to a specific memory or trigger.

Complex PTSD includes those elements, but goes further.

 

With complex PTSD, trauma doesn’t just live in memory. It lives in:

  • Identity (how you see yourself)
  • Relationships (How you respond and attach in relationships)
  • Emotional regulation (how you manage your emotions)
  • Self-worth (How you feel about yourself)
  • Attachment patterns (avoidant or anxious)
  • The nervous system’s baseline state (I call this your internal temperature. Think of the classic frog metaphor: if you put a frog in cool water and slowly turn up the heat, it doesn’t notice the gradual change until it’s too late. Many of us live like that frog—our internal “water” has been heating up for so long that a highly activated, stressed-out baseline feels normal, even though it’s slowly wearing us down.)
 

Instead of “Something bad happened to me,” complex PTSD often sounds like:

  • “Something is wrong with me.”
  • “I don’t feel like a real person.”
  • “I’m too much—or not enough.”
  • “I can’t trust myself or others.”
  • “I don’t know who I am outside of survival.”

This is why people with complex PTSD often feel confused when therapy helps but does not resolve issues completely. The trauma isn’t just remembered, it’s embedded. It has created an internal environment that feels “right” to your system, that same temperature I talked about earlier, so starting to feel better actually feels wrong at first, and it takes time for your system to adjust.

 

Why Complex PTSD Affects So Many Symptoms

 

Complex PTSD shapes the nervous system from the inside out.

When stress or threat is chronic, the nervous system doesn’t get to return to baseline. It adapts by staying prepared, through hypervigilance, emotional numbing, people-pleasing, shutdown, or collapse. Clients often say why does the healthy thing feel wrong.  Getting your automatic defense system offline takes time.  And the right kind of therapy for you. 

 

Over time, this affects:

  • Mood regulation
  • Attention and concentration
  • Sense of safety in the body
  • Ability to rest
  • Boundaries
  • Relationships
  • Motivation
  • Self-trust

Anxiety, depression, dissociation, chronic shame, emotional overwhelm, emptiness, and exhaustion are not separate problems, they are expressions of the same survival system.

This is why complex PTSD can look like many diagnoses at once, and why people often feel misdiagnosed, misunderstood, or told that everything is “just trauma” without real relief.

 

“Why Can’t I Get Better?” A Question Worth Taking Seriously

 

If you’ve ever asked yourself this, it doesn’t mean you’re failing therapy.

It may mean your system is responding exactly as it was shaped to.

 

Complex PTSD is especially common when:

  • Trauma happened early
  • Trauma was relational
  • There was no safe adult, environment, or consistent repair
  • Survival required adapting your emotions, needs, or identity

In these cases, healing is not about revisiting memories alone. It’s about helping the nervous system learn something it never learned before: sustained regulation.

That takes time. And it takes the right framework.

 

Complex PTSD and the Body

 

Trauma research has long shown that trauma changes how the brain and body function. Psychiatrist Bessel van der Kolk famously described how trauma is stored not just as memory, but as bodily experience.

 

With complex PTSD, the body often lives in:

  • Chronic tension
  • Fatigue
  • Startle responses
  • Shutdown
  • Dissociation
  • Emotional flooding
  • Difficulty sensing internal needs

 

This is not a failure of coping. It’s a nervous system that never learned how to stand down.

Understanding this shifts the question from “What’s wrong with me?” to “What did my system have to learn in order to survive?” 

These defense responses did their job to help you survive some horrible things but now it's time to bounce back to lower that water temperature.  

 

Why Complex PTSD Often Goes Unrecognized

 

Complex PTSD is frequently missed because:

  • Symptoms are spread across many areas
  • People don’t report a single “big” trauma
  • Early experiences were normalized or minimized
  • Clients present with anxiety, depression, or relationship issues
  • Treatment focuses on insight without regulation

When everything is framed as a trauma response, though, another problem can emerge: over-reduction.

Not everything is trauma.

And effective treatment depends on knowing the difference.

 

Special Considerations: When Complex PTSD Co-Occurs with Other Conditions

 

One of the most important shifts in trauma-informed care is recognizing that complex PTSD often co-occurs with other neurologically based conditions-and that treatment must address all of them.

 

ADHD and Complex PTSD

 

ADHD and complex PTSD frequently overlap. Research shows high rates of co-occurrence, and the relationship is bidirectional:

  • ADHD increases vulnerability to repeated stress and trauma
  • Chronic trauma can intensify attention, regulation, and executive functioning difficulties

Symptoms such as distractibility, emotional reactivity, restlessness, shutdown, and overwhelm can belong to either, or both.

 

If ADHD is missed, treatment may focus only on trauma processing while core executive functioning needs go unsupported. If trauma is missed, ADHD treatment alone may not address emotional and relational patterns.

With complex PTSD, it is often both, not either/or.

 

 

Autism and Complex PTSD

 

Autistic individuals are also at increased risk for complex trauma, particularly when sensory needs, communication differences, and social vulnerability go unrecognized.

Sensory overwhelm, shutdown, and social exhaustion are sometimes interpreted solely as trauma responses when they may also reflect underlying neurodevelopmental differences.

When autism is not identified, treatment may unintentionally push tolerance, exposure, or emotional processing that overwhelms rather than heals.

Understanding your neurotype is essential, not to replace trauma work, but to make it effective.

 

 

OCD and Complex PTSD

 

OCD deserves special mention.

Intrusive thoughts, compulsions, and mental rituals are neurologically driven. While trauma can influence OCD content or severity, OCD cannot be resolved through trauma processing alone.

When OCD is misinterpreted as a trauma response:

  • Compulsions may be reinforced
  • Reassurance may increase symptoms
  • Treatment may stall or worsen distress

 

With complex PTSD, OCD can coexist alongside trauma, and both must be treated directly, using the right approaches for each.

Again: both/and, not either/or.

 

 

Why Accurate Diagnosis Matters with Complex PTSD

 

Effective treatment is not about labeling, it’s about precision.

 

When complex PTSD is present alongside ADHD, autism, or OCD:

  • Trauma therapy must be paced and regulating
  • Neurodiversity needs must be included
  • Neurological differences must be treated directly
  • Symptoms must be differentiated, not collapsed

Reducing everything to trauma can feel validating at first—but over time, it limits healing.

True trauma-informed care asks a better question:

What all is happening in Your body—and how do we support each part appropriately?

 

 

A More Hopeful Reframe

 

If you suspect complex PTSD, it doesn’t mean you’re harder to treat.

It means your system adapted deeply-and wisely-to conditions that required it.

Healing complex PTSD is not about erasing the past.

It’s about expanding capacity, restoring regulation, and building a sense of self that is no longer organized around survival.

And when co-occurring conditions are identified and treated alongside trauma, progress often feels less confusing, and far more sustainable.

If you’ve been wondering why things haven’t clicked yet, complex PTSD may be the missing context, not the end of the story.

It’s often the beginning of one that finally makes sense.