Posts by:
KD Holmes, LPC has been a therapist for 16 years working with anxiety disorders, phobias, OCD, and trauma.
Have you ever had a dream that seemed so out of reach, so impossible to achieve? And the shame of not being able to achieve it became unbearable so overtime you slowly buried it deep within you, and now you have forgot about it altogether. If so, then welcome to my brain, my office, my world– where we will be uncovering and exploring those hopes and dreams hidden in the dark corner of your soul.
Many seek therapy because they are blocked in some way. Some blocks are like the road has ended at a steep cliff with no bridge to cross over to the other side. Some of these blocks are health issues, mental health issues, or tragic life experiences.
As I personally loathe fad trends in eating and exercise, I immediately felt annoyed when my physician suggested a book by Mark Sisson's Primal Endurance. Assuming the content would cover those things exactly. Nevertheless, I had paid to see this doctor, so I desisted and bought the book.
There are so many new terms that float around social media. My favorite one right now is Neurodiversity. This term has provided self compassion and acceptance of myself and ultimately my brain.
Many of my clients ask what ERP stands for? Exposure and Response Prevention sounds so formal and technical. Simply put, it is a process that creates ORDER out of mental CHAOS. It works by systematically facing your obsessions while abstaining from your compulsions. ERP is helpful when combined with lots of other skills.
What if for your New Year's resolution you did not choose something that was perfectionistic, self-hating, idealistic, and counter to how you live your life? So many New Year's Resolutions are created from our emotional minds.
What if you threw out expectations of yourself, idealized images, and cultural views super imposed upon you? Do you think listening to these parts keeps you from giving into a hedonistic life style? What if you wiped your internal slate clean? Would it frighten you to choose from your authentic self?
So in addition to holiday stress, some of us can add in our internal struggles that don’t stop simply because it’s the holidays. It can feel bleak and never-ending like a Zombie Apocalypse.
Imagine you have an internal stress bucket that is half full from the year, then add in more stress from the holidays, and more stress because of your mental health. This is a recipe for your stress bucket to overflow this holiday season.
As I am trying to unpack a person's struggle I often think...What is it like to be you? What is it like to have your upbringing, to have your brain, and to manage all of that in your own way? For better or worse we are a culmination of genetics, social factors, and how we cope with both of these.
Sometimes in my office people are curious about me. Some ask what do I struggle with? There is an assumption that therapists do not struggle because of what they know. Knowing and doing are two different types of learning. I had an anxiety disorder for most of my life. I suffered from depression and anxiety when I was a child and young adult.
Have you ever had a thought that just keeps popping up in your head? These kinds of thoughts can be images, phrases, even feelings that intrude upon an otherwise perfect moment. These intrusions are not hidden desires or even thoughts the sufferer wants to think. They just pop on in your head and terrify you. In Obsessive Compulsive Disorder they get stuck, and play on repeat in your mind. Because once isn't terrifying enough, let's play that thought again and again, and compulsively check if it is still there.
