K.D. Holmes Blog

What if for your New Year's resolution you did not choose something that was perfectionistic, self-hating, idealistic, and counter to how you live your life? So many New Year's Resolutions are created from our emotional minds.  

What if you threw out expectations of yourself, idealized images, and cultural views super imposed upon you?  Do you think listening to these parts keeps you from giving into a hedonistic life style? What if you wiped your internal slate clean? Would it frighten you to choose from your authentic self?   

Gratitude is an oldy-but-goody thought practice that can change your mental focus from the glass is half-empty to half-full. It's an example of one of my favorite DBT skills -- acting opposite.  I am reminded of it weekly when clients start to feel better by resistantly practicing acting opposite.

Moving through is composed of acceptance, mindfulness, and accessing your wise mind.   Acceptance is accepting the facts both external and internal.

By accepting our reactions/feelings, then sitting with your feelings, (a mindfulness practice), this enables accessing your wise mind for guidance on moving through any problem.  

It appears that most people think that they can come to therapy whenever they want and return when they feel like it. As if therapy is an as-needed type of attendance when...

1. What are reasonable therapeutic expectations?

Most clients have no idea how long it will take to change reactions to symptoms or habits that are part of how they live their lives. Changing our reactions to symptoms depends on several factors such as how long we have been experiencing symptoms and maladaptive reactions. Are they connected to other habits or symptoms?