Are You Ready to Come Home?

When I am in my office,  I am guided by what I needed when I was younger.  I needed a therapist that was empathic, funny, nonjudgmental and above all else someone who simply listens. It’s important that every client I work with feels heard and validated. 

it’s an honor to offer space where you can feel at home in who you are.

Qualities of Effective Therapists

• Empathic

• Funny

• Nonjudgmental

• "A Good Listener" consists of: 

  Validating client's feeling, providing"confrontations",  and acceptance

I love working with any human who has felt that they could not be themselves. Whether through implicit or explicit messages given to them by the world, their family, or their friends; they’ve had to dissect themselves into smaller pieces to feel accepted and included. Through the helping relationship I would love to give them the chance for you to feel whole again and to practice that wholeness with the intent of becoming that person in all facets of their lives.
 
I’ve operated under the assumption throughout my adolescent-into-adult-life that my parents probably intended to have a different kind of daughter. You know, a sweet girl who maintained a certain fashion sense, went along with the social crowds, and probably married in her early to mid 20s a man who could really provide for her and their future children.

And what they got, God bless ‘em, was me. A Single, 30-something, tattooed, perennial student with no children in sight but two darling cats. I do no doubt that my parents love me. I had a wonderful childhood, and they continue to support me into adulthood. But I know my choices aren’t what they’d want for me.
 
This whole trend began when I was a moody, maladjusted teenager. I asked to be put on antidepressants because, in my infinite adolescent wisdom, I was clearly depressed. I’m pretty sure I also asked to go to counseling. And both requests were rebuffed. There wasn’t anything wrong with me that they could see. And the loaded implication of their child needing counseling was probably too much to deal with. I know now this request can be seen as a challenge to their parenting efficacy. Spoiler alert: even kids with incredible home lives full of support and love may need counseling from time to time.

Therapy Indicators:

• Depressed mood

• Anxiety daily or several times a week

• Reports of Pressure to perform well academically

• Crying spells

• Reports of feeling lonely and different

• Irritable mood - may consist of sarcasm and eye rolling

• Asking to attend therapy

I was always sad, anxious and feeling like I would implode at any moment. I put a tremendous amount of pressure on myself to perform well academically, participate in extracurriculars and to maintain some sort of positive relationship with my peers as well as dating. I cried a lot. Like, a lot. And I felt alone. I was a whopping 1 year older than most of my classmates (due to starting school earlier in another state) combined with being terminally earnest (“She’s so mature!”) and I felt like a complete weirdo. So I did what all teenagers do and channeled that insecurity into being a complete and utter jerk. I remember a lot of sarcasm, under the breath commenting, and intense eye-rolling.

Therapy Benefits:

• Helps clients feel valid and real 

• Its a gift to bestow on someone

• Helps parents model good mental health hygiene

• To promote acceptance of self and growth

Being a decade removed from this experience feels surreal. I’ve been in counseling for years myself and have been working with adolescents in some form or fashion for about 6 years. The breadth and depth of their feelings never ceases to amaze me and remind me that everything I felt was valid and real. It feels like we’re so quick to write off teen angst as hormonal nonsense they have to just endure like the rest of us—that suffering builds character. But it doesn’t have to be that way.

Putting your child in counseling is one of the kindest gifts you can bestow upon them. Going to counseling as a parent is another fantastic way of modeling good mental health hygiene. It’s removing stigma and telling people, “I am taking care of myself, and I want my child to do the same.” If I could go back and do it all over again, I’d reassure my parents that they were doing their best, but I still felt sad. That I never doubted their love for me but that I needed someone to help me process my experiences and provide me with ways to deal with life.

It takes a village to raise a child, and I am so happy to invite you to my home (i.e. office) and into my village!