Monet David Blog

When the subject of sex comes up in session it is often in hushed whispers with eyes diverted to the ground. People (adults usually) are admitting out loud, sometimes for the first time ever, a part of themselves they have never had the chance to be vulnerable about or even explore in depth. Our sexuality is just as much a part of us as any other aspect of identity, but it is often unattended and undeveloped. Partly because we live in an erotophobic society and partly because we don’t truly ever receive quality, comprehensive sex education. So, what does that mean for us?

One of the beautiful things about therapy is the possibility it possesses. I have had the pleasure of witnessing growth right before my eyes as folks come to understand themselves on a deeper level. I am fortunate enough to have highly motivated clients who show up consistently, ready to hit the ground running and offer me the chance to point out incongruencies or patterns of behavior that can help them become better versions of themselves. But I have a secret to share with you—sometimes just showing up to session isn’t enough.

The frequency with which anxiety exists in our bodies can only be described as frenetic and unrelenting. A hive of bees when it is at its worst. An amalgamation of symptoms—elevated heart rate, dilated pupils, shortness of breath, tensed muscles. It’s no wonder those of us burdened with anxiety move quickly—from one task to another, constantly planning and waiting for the next crisis we will inevitably overthink. It’s taxing both emotionally and physically. To overcome such intense symptoms feels impossible. But what if it isn’t?

One of the first questions I ask a new client..... what is your opinion about medication, and what are your past experiences with medication? Often, clients are open to the idea of pursuing medication to address their symptoms and trust my clinical judgement when referring for medication management. Some clients have bad experiences with medication and let me know that they are reluctant to try again.

The therapeutic relationship is such a fascinating concept to me. I invite you, as my client, to join me, your therapist, in an intimate, vulnerable space with clear set boundaries. It seems like for many clients this is a novel experience. They are typically seeking counseling services to address interpersonal conflicts wrought with enmeshment and boundary violations. In these contexts, therapy can serve as a model for what positive, open relationships can look like in one’s life.

Can we talk about gender? I mean, it’s all that’s talked about these days and so it’s not a stretch to ask, but what if we really talked about it? Let’s say your child, your daughter in this example, comes to you and says, “Mom (or Dad or Grandma, you get the picture), I’m not a girl.” How do you react? What does this mean for you? Your family? Is your world turned upside down? It’s a lot to take in. Especially if you haven’t considered what gender means to you. So, let’s do that now.

Dirty mirror selfie for your nerves. 

Recently, a client admitted they had been searching for an older, gay male clinician. They desired to connect with an elder from within their own community. Who can blame them? But, as they discovered, there really aren’t any in Lafayette, Louisiana.