I love food and the joy of flavors, hot, sweet, sour, salty with temperatures warm and cold, while having different textures with each bite. There is so much in a good meal. Therapists are the same way. We each have our own flavor, temperature, texture, which creates our way of "doing" therapy in our offices. A good therapist has developed their own style based on a culmination of life experiences, interests, personality, and TRAINING. There is an art to therapy.
K.D. Holmes Blog
Sometimes in my office people are curious about me. Some ask what do I struggle with? There is an assumption that therapists do not struggle because of what they know. Knowing and doing are two different types of learning. I had an anxiety disorder for most of my life. I suffered from depression and anxiety when I was a child and young adult.
Have you ever had a thought that just keeps popping up in your head? These kinds of thoughts can be images, phrases, even feelings that intrude upon an otherwise perfect moment. These intrusions are not hidden desires or even thoughts the sufferer wants to think. They just pop on in your head and terrify the suffer. In Obsessive Compulsive Disorder they get stuck, and play on repeat in your mind. Because once isn't terrifying enough, let's play that thought again and again, and compulsively check if it is still there.
I began working with individuals who had OCD about 10 to 12 years ago... I have gotten lost in time and forgotten how long it has been exactly. I came upon the diagnosis unknowingly when I could not diagnose someone. I was stumped and anything that baffles me sparks my curiosity.
During my first session with a client (also known as “the intake session”) I always ask no matter what the mental health issue—
I am told by my clients I am soft, easy to talk to, and silly. But objectively it's hard to gage when you work alone in a room with one other person. Therapists are trained to be soft, warm, and do no harm. When we only do that, we create an environment for people to stay stuck, avoid, and ultimately not improve.
There are so many new terms that float around social media. My favorite one right now is Neurodiversity. This term has provided self compassion and acceptance of myself and ultimately my brain.
Many of the individuals I work with (myself included) are plagued by an obsessive brain. Obsessive brains are repetitive, stuck, living in a rabbit hole of thinking that leads to nowhere but feels real to the sufferer. These individuals are often diagnosed with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, which is composed of obsessions followed by compulsions.
It’s been a long time since I had an adventure. I have been consumed by my day-to-day responsibilities of my relationship, work, family. I try to fit in all the important things. This is what I call having an intentional life that is driven by my values. No pressure? SMH... Its actually the complete opposite. I live with lots of internal pressure and too much movement.
Many of my clients would never guess that I have social anxiety. If you watch my videos, it would seem highly unlikely that I become overwhelmed when I am around a group of people I don't know. There is a big misnomer that if we know better we do better...but knowing is not learning. The two are completely different concepts. You can read a book about brain surgery, but doing it is a learning process based on lots of actions.