What is Trauma Brain?
Many people unknowingly live with what I call "Trauma Brain." It’s an invisible force driving their actions, emotions, and even physical symptoms,...
Have you buried a dream so deep within that you’ve forgotten it altogether? A dream that once seemed so unattainable that even thinking of it became unbearable? If so, welcome to my world—the space where we confront the impossible and uncover those hopes that lie in the dark corners of your soul.
For so many of us, our "impossibility stories" arise from a mix of societal pressure, life events, our values, and even the well-meaning words of family and friends. But I’m here to tell you that if you suspend those stories, even momentarily, and take just one brave step, a new reality starts to unfold.
The starting point for this remarkable evolution? Look within. Uncovering yourself begins by understanding the interplay between your inner stories, beliefs, and the life you've lived so far. These stories—shaped by experiences, relationships, and even societal expectations—often hold the key to why you think, feel, and act the way you do. This uncovering is what therapy is all about peeling back the layers to gain clarity and insight into your inner world. Self-exploration can be done alone through reflection and introspection, but it is far more rewarding and effective when done with another human. A skilled therapist provides guidance, and perspective, helping you uncover truths you may not have been able to see on your own.
Your history significantly impacts how you perceive what is possible. Trauma—whether a single event or chronic developmental trauma—rewires the brain, altering how we respond to our emotions. The brain works in overdrive, seeing metaphorical lions everywhere. Anxiety, fear, and sadness may overwhelm you, making progression feel insurmountable.
But therapy offers a safe space to unravel these complex stories. By examining the patterns shaped by past experiences, you can begin to treat the emotions that underlie your reactions. It’s not about erasing the emotions but learning to walk forward despite them.
Facing fears is no easy feat, but stepping into what feels impossible can lay the foundation for personal growth and healing. For me, anxiety often felt like a wall I couldn’t break through. Then I decided to face myself unexpectedly—by taking on physical challenges that mirrored the mental mountains I was climbing.
Picture this: I found myself driving through foreign countries, navigating chaotic roads. I ended a relationship I believed would define me forever. And then, came the moment I stood at the edge of a daunting trail in Hawaii, ready to hike 11 miles with a 30-pound backpack. It was as though my very existence boiled down to taking that first step—and then the next.
The Kalalau Trail in Hawaii tested every fiber of my being—physically, emotionally, and mentally. Each step revealed parts of me that I didn’t realize existed. When the trail became steep, rocky, and outright treacherous, my mind screamed thoughts of giving up. But every time I wanted to stop, I reminded myself to just take one more step, to focus only on what was directly in front of me.
The trail wasn't easy. My backpack weighed me down, and my shoes had to grip slippery rocks as I stumbled my way closer to my goal. But every obstacle became a metaphor for my inner struggles. Every time I pushed through what felt impossible, I proved to myself, "I can do hard things."
The experience truly tested not just my physical boundaries but my mental strength. When DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy) encourages using "opposite action" to face emotions, this hike became a living embodiment of that. Opposite action means doing what anxiety tells you not to do—moving closer to the fear rather than backing away.
Each time I doubted myself, I practiced moving against my own instinct to run from discomfort. That, I realized, is where true growth happens—not in the absence of fear but in action despite its presence.
When I reached the most dangerous part of the trail, aptly named "Crawler’s Ledge," everything in me froze. A narrow, 2-foot-wide rock ledge loomed over a 200-foot drop into the crashing waves below. My heart raced. My palms sweated. Voices from the past whispered in my mind, "Turn back. It’s too dangerous. It’s not worth it."
But there, on that terrifying ledge, I found an inner strength I didn’t know I had. I inched forward, unable to walk, so I scooted on my bottom—a move that might have been ridiculous in another moment but felt like the only way to push ahead. My travel partner’s presence, her courage and encouragement, reminded me that connection can anchor us when we feel untethered.
When we finally reached the other side, I couldn’t hold back the tears. Relief, pride, and exhaustion poured out. It was in that moment that I realized something profound—confidence doesn’t come from erasing self-doubt. Confidence is born in the tiny victories where you feel the fear and take the leap anyway.
The trail also taught me another lesson that often intersects with therapy—healing is a mix of personal growth and the support of your community. Whether it’s a trusted friend who walks beside you or a therapist cheering you on, having someone by your side can make the impossible feel just a bit more manageable. Leaning in doesn’t make you weak; it makes you human.
What’s holding YOU back? Is it anxiety? Sadness? The fear of trying again and failing? Perhaps the root of your impossibility story lies in a whisper of self-doubt too faint to hear but strong enough to permeate your choices.
For me, every step on the Kalalau Trail symbolized reclaiming parts of my life once ruled by fear and hesitation. Anxiety made my world small. Fear dictated my choices. But the incremental challenges helped me push past imagined boundaries and rediscover my own spark. And here’s the thing—it wasn’t easy. Growth never is. You have to wake up every day and choose it, even when you're terrified.
And if you feel stuck? That’s okay. Stuck doesn’t mean motionless forever. Sometimes stuck is just a pause before the next step.
Taking risks and pushing your limits doesn’t have to start on a mountain trail. Maybe it starts by having that first therapy session you’ve been putting off. Maybe it's sharing something with a loved one you've been afraid to say. Or maybe, it’s as simple and courageous as facing one "small lion" in the safety of your inner world.
What this process has shown me—and I hope shows you—is that life is beautiful not when it’s easy but when it’s meaningful. Whether in a therapy chair or on the edge of a rocky cliff, self-growth demands you confront the hard things to discover who you truly are on the other side.
Life offers countless opportunities to evolve. Some moments may be full of metaphorical (and literal!) vomit—and that’s okay. Every effort to face fear is worth it, even when it doesn’t unfold the way you expected.
The views from life’s toughest climbs can leave you breathless in all the ways that matter. The sun will shine on your face, and gratitude will surge in your heart. You’ll realize that even though fear didn’t disappear, you've grown bigger than it.
You can do this. You are more than your anxiety, your fear, your impossibility story. You are a spark, waiting to be reignited. Take the first step today—whether it’s in therapy, on a trail, or in your own heart—and see where it leads.
Because trust me, you don’t yet know the person you will become on the other side.
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